Armageddon 2004 PPV Ramblings

Posted on: August 31st, 2014 by Big Cal

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Armageddon 2004

 

My 50th PPV Ramble (not counting RR’s and WM’s that I’d already done). And my 50th PPV Ramble could be one of the WORST shows I’ll ever have to write about. Yey!

 

RVD & Rey Mysterio Vs Rene Dupree & Kenzo Susuke – WWE Tag Team Championship Match

Literally had to wait until Rey made his entrance before I could type his name into the match title. I genuinely don’t remember him and RVD ever being tag team champions :lmao.

Oh god didn’t know who their opponents were going to be. Susuke might have been the WORST “new” guy in WWE during 2004. And Dupree can GTFO too.

Great start to this show :lmao.

Rating: NO
CAL SCALE – -1

 

Kurt Angle Vs Santa – Kurt Angle Invitational

Angle has a match later, but apparently wanted to make Santa tap out first. Match ends in 25 seconds. I DIDN’T EVEN HAVE TIME TO “NO” IT :lmao.

Rating: DUD
CAL SCALE – 0

 

Mike Mizanin Vs Daniel Puder – Dixie Dog Fight

:lmao oh god no.

Rating: NO
CAL SCALE – -1

 

Hardcore Holly & Charlie Hass Vs The Basham Brothers

:lmao

Rating: NO
CAL SCALE – -1

 

John Cena Vs Jesus – United States Championship No DQ, Falls Count Anywhere Match

:lmao

:lmao

Rating: NO
CAL SCALE – -1

 

Miss Jackie Vs Dawn Marie – Special Referee Charlie Hass

Fuck me sideways :lmao.

Rating: NO
CAL SCALE – -1

 

The Big Show Vs Kurt Angle, Luther Reigns & mark Jindrak

Well, I’ll give this a watch. Show and Angle have had some fun matches in the past.

Show beats up Jindrak, and Angle tags in which is who Show REALLY wants. Show uses his power to shove him across the ring so Angle tags out like a pussy, leaving us with LUTHER REIGNS and Jindrak to work this match… urgh.

Show is knocked down so Angle decides to get him some of the giant… for about 10 seconds before tagging out AGAIN. Urgh.

More dull shit with those 2 other dudes beating down Show, then Angle tags in and… locks in a hold and sits in it.

Big Show makes a comeback, destroys Jindrak and then hits the WEAKEST Irish Whip ever and Reigns takes the worst bump over the ropes from it :lmao. Terrible :lmao

F-5 FROM THE BIG SHOW!!! Hits Jindrak with it and wins. SCREW YOU LESNAR :lmao.

Awful.

Rating: DUD
CAL SCALE – 0

 

Spike Dudley Vs Funaki – WWE Cruiserweight Championship Match

2 of the least appealing Cruiserweights EVER in WWE…

Rating: NO
CAL SCALE – -1

 

JBL Vs The Undertaker Vs Eddie Guerrero Vs Booker T – WWE Championship Match

A 4 way match for the title… that ISN’T built around 3 guys simply wanting a title match and being thrown together. They all have had beef with JBL in 2004 revolving around the WWE championship. He screwed them all out of wins and cheated his way to a longer reign, and now his ARMAGEDDON IS HERE.

Love JBL in the back before the match just staring at his title, before his “cabinet” all come in to shake his hand and “wish him luck”… basically knowing JBL has no chance in HELL of retaining. Added to the DRAMA of the whole thing :mark:.

:mark: @ JBL almost in TEARS as Undertaker makes his entrance. He has really gone into this match EXPECTING to lose his WWE title. Poor guy! :p

Look at the TALENT in this too. And then Booker T. Urgh. Should have been Rey. Switch the two around. Rey in this match would have added AWESOMENESS to it, and Booker/RVD end up being tag partners in 05 I think?

BELL RINGS~! JBL bails immediately. Booker and Eddie go over to the ropes to see what he’s doing, while Undertaker decides to fuck up whoever is left in the ring.

:lmao JBL has Booker T pinned for about a 20 count, but the ref is too busy watching Undertaker and Eddie :lmao.

JBL IS TRAPPED~! He pinballs around, taking shots from all 3 guys. Undertaker goes for a cover on JBL, forcing Eddie and Booker to double team the Dead Man to try and take him out of the match because he is the biggest threat to everyone no doubt.

:lmao Booker T is terrible. He sees JBL covering Eddie… and he still decides to take his fucking time getting in the ring. He was battling Undertaker on the outside, he has no idea what happened. JBL could have hit a CLOTHESLINE FROM HELL. Eddie might have been DONE. And Booker T would have let JBL win then and there because he didn’t want to rush getting in the fucking ring :lmao.

A minute later, Undertaker has JBL covered and what happens? EDDIE RUNS OVER TO BREAK IT UP. See, Eddie knows what he’s doing. Then JBL covers Booker and Undertaker punches JBL in the face to break it up. UNDERTAKER knows what he’s doing too. Someone PLEASE explain to me why Booker T got any kind of a push in 2004, resulting in him being in this match?

Everyone fights on the floor, then we end up with EDDIE VS UNDERTAKER ONE ON ONE IN THE RING :mark:. These two NEVER had a singles match together, in fact this and a 6 man tag in 2002 is the ONLY time they were in a match together (at the same time, technically they were both in the 03 RR lol).

Dammit, Booker T ruins it all. I guess the UNDERTAKER VS EDDIE part isn’t until later on in the match :(.

:mark: Undertaker goes for Old School on Booker, Eddie runs over to stop it but Undertaker, while on the ropes, KICKS EDDIE IN THE HEAD and then goes for Old School still :mark:.

:mark: Eddie running away from Undertaker scared as fuck :mark:. I think it’s time for EDDIE VS UNDERTAKER part of this match :mark:.

CLOTHESLINE FROM HELL TO UNDERTAKER ON THE FLOOR~! I guess it’s not quite time yet then :lmao.

Instead of UNDERTAKER VS EDDIE we get… JBL Vs Booker T. Urgh.

Eddie senses that everyone is bored shitless with this crap so… LADDER~! Which he… leaves on the outside…

Booker T gets a ton of offense, lands the Axe Kick on Eddie… AND EDDIE KICKS OUT! THANK YOU EDDIE *CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP*. If he didn’t kick out, Booker T would have been champion. URGH.

:lmao JBL tries to powerbomb Booker T through the announce table, but Booker gets caught up in some wires and JBL and lift him too high :lmao. Elbow drop breaks the table though :).

LAST RIDE TO JBL THROUGH THE OTHER ANNOUNCE TABLE. JBL knows how to take a fucking powerbomb through a table. Fuck you, Booker.

Wait… JBL through a table. Booker through a table. Undertaker left standing… Eddie in the ring… can it be? Is it time? :mark:

Eddie realises Undertaker is left standing, so he drops to the mat and plays dead to sucker in the Dead Man!!! :mark:

Tombstone, but Eddie is fine and escapes… only to run right into a fucking CHOKESLAM :mark:. THE UNDERTAKER IS GONNA DO IT! HE’S GONNA WIN! HE’S GONNA WIN! LAST RIDE SIGNAL :mark:.

Las Ride… but Eddie grabbed the WWE title belt! Smashes it in his face! Frog Splash! Another Frog Splash! Undertaker kicks out at 2 and SITS UP :mark:. Eddie is shitting himself, tries to escape but gets caught so… LOW BLOW!!!

Oh hey, the LADDER is finally coming into play now! Yey.

FROG SPLASH OFF THE LADDER~! 1…2… JBL DRAGS THE REFEREE OUT OF THE RING!

3 Amigos to JBL! Oh and NOW Booker T decides to break up a fucking count. What a cunt.

CHOKESLAM TO BOOKER~! CHOKESLAM TO EDDIE~! CHOKESLAM TO JBL~! The Dead Man has this one in the fucking BAG.

Undertaker goes for a Tombstone… but HEIDENREICH shows up and attacks Undertaker!

JBL manages to land a Clothesline from Hell (off camera :lmao) to Booker T and RETAINS HIS TITLE while Eddie is down and Heidenreich is beating down Undertaker.

Match… kinda drags mostly. Undertaker Vs Eddie stuff is a million stars, but everything else bar a few parts here and there is slow and dull.

Rating: **3/4
CAL SCALE – 1

 

Overall CAL SCALE – -5

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