WrestleMania 3

Posted on: March 13th, 2013 by Big Cal

WM 3

 

I own this as a Tagged Classic, which has those edits in I mentioned in the last review… however I also own the Championship Edition which has 2 discs. One is essentially the Anthology version (with different menus), and the second disc is the same… but with info and facts and shit popping up on the screen. Kinda pointless, but it was going out of stock and was only like £3 so I picked it up. Anyway… WM 3. One of the biggest WM events ever due to the amount of people in the arena, the huge buyrate it did, and the main event that is arguable the BIGGEST match in WM history. But is it any good?

Match 1 – The Magnificent Muraco & Bob Orton Jr Vs The Can-Am Connection – Martel and Tom Zenk (yawn) are the Can-Am Connection. This reminds me of the Funks tag match from WM 2, in that Bob Orton  is the Terry Funk of the match, really being the one to hold everything together and keep me interested because he’s just one of those guys who is so good it doesn’t matter what they’re doing, because they’re doing it well. Some stooging and comedy spots done by Bob similar to Funk so I’m happy lol.  Match is shorter and more fast paced than the WM 2 tag, so just as things get a little interesting it ends. Give this twice as much time, with Orton & Muraco controlling the match for a while and I’d be all over this. As it was though, it was fun but nothing more. *1/2.

Match 2 – Billy Jack Haynes Vs Hercules – So… Hercules’ gimmick isn’t that he’s simply called Hercules because he’s strong and shit… he ACTUALLY THINKS HE’S HERCULES. He makes reference to something he did thousands of years ago during his promo. LOL. This is a Full Nelson Challenge or something. I don’t know if it means they can only win with the Full Nelson, or if they just threw the name onto the match because both men use it. Guess we’ll find out. Pretty impressive to see Hercules get press slammed so easily. NICE fucking clothesline from Hercules to cut off Haynes. Ok, so no, they don’t have to win with the Full Nelson, but they want to so I’m fine with that. Honestly, there really isn’t anything BAD about this match other than its length. It’s under 8 minutes, and only 2 minutes longer than the opener, but when you have 2 “power” guys going at it, 8 minutes feels like a LONG fucking time. Match ends with a shitty DQ finish too which sucks. No… double count out. Huh, thought Heenan got involved causing a DQ lol. Ah well. So with a couple of minutes shaved off this and an actual finish, this probably would have been a solid match. *.

Match 3 – King Kong Bundy, Little Tokyo & Lord Littlebrook Vs Hillbilly Jim, Little Beaver & The Haiti Kid – 4 midgets, a Hillbilly and a fatty. No, it isn’t the start of a joke. It’s a fucking WRESTLEMANIA MATCH. No thanks. NO.

Interview backstage with Heenan, Race and Moolah. Moolah looks TERRIFIED lol. She’s wooden as shit, and while Heenan is talking to her she’s like stone just staring right into the camera with the occasional glance over at Bobby before back to the camera.

Match 4 – Harley Race Vs Junkyard Dog – THE DOG ON ALL FOURS, HIS FAVOURITE POSITION! Short match again here, but some fun “old school” schtick. Harley tries to headbutt JYD but JYD’s head is harder, and from there the Dog just knocks the King around and Race bounces around, falling out of the ring and all that shit. Makes me smile lol. Then Race hits a belly to belly out of nowhere after a little distraction from Heenan and its over. JYD has to bow to the KING after the match, and he does, then he attacks Race with a chair lol. It’s so short to be… anything really, even if I did get a kick out of it. 1/4*.

Match 5 – The Rougeau Brothers Vs Brutus Beefcake & Greg Valentine – Well, on paper this looks to have potential. Rougeau’s are a good team, and while I despise Brutus, he seems to be fine in a team with Valentine. Maybe he just started sucking when he became the Barber? Or maybe teaming with someone the calibre of Valentine hides most of his flaws? I’m leaning heavy to one side… I’m sure you can figure out which lol. Great. Hardly any time. Again. Dino Bravo helps out Valentine and Beefcake get the win, but Brutus doesn’t look pleased because… fuck knows. They leave him behind. Ok. DUD.

Match 6 – Rowdy Roddy Piper Vs Adorable Adrian Adonis – Piper’s retirement match! Except… he would still wrestle for another 20 years LOL. Not as bad as Funk, who retired numerous times. Super fun in the beginning. Adonis bumps around like no other fat guy can, Jimmy Hart tries to get involved and ends up taking a few big bumps too, before the numbers game finally gets the better of Piper and Adonis can work over the Hot Rod. Crowd are just eating this shit up. Sure, we might get (much) better match quality overall, but I do sometimes wish things were like they used to be. Fans going apeshit because practically ANY babyface does ANYTHING to the heel. If only I was born 10 years earlier, I could have lived through this for real! Watching it back on DVD isn’t quite the same, but I still get a ton of enjoyment out of it regardless. Adonis gets Piper in the sleeper, and thinks it’s all over, even celebrates… then Brutus shows up to wake up Piper. Uhhhh… what? Why? I just don’t fucking get it lol. AT ALL. Piper locks in the sleeper and this one is over! Here come the shears! And I guess this is the beginning of Brutus “The Barber” Beefcake. Urgh. Adonis gets his head shaved, something Adonis and Hart wanted to do to Piper. Match isn’t great, but again it was pretty fun. Nothing more. 1/2*.

Match 7 – The Hart Foundation & Danny Davis Vs The British Bulldogs & Tito Santana – Danny Davis is doing the “referee” gimmick. He isn’t to be confused with the OVW owner and trainer, Danny Davis lol. I used to (still do, actually) have a VHS with the “best of WM”. One match from the first 4 WM events. And THIS was the match for WM 3. LOL. LMFAO highlight of this match is seeing Jesse Ventura basically kidnapping Matilda, the dog mascot of the Bulldogs, and taking it to the back. Basic tag work as the Hart Foundation keep Dynamite in their corner. They work Davis into the match nicely, just tagging in, getting a shot or two in, the tagging right back out before he can get in any trouble. The heels get too cocky though, and launch Davis over the ropes onto Kid who gets his knees up! Danny is hurt, Kid gets the tag and the babyfaces take turns at finally getting payback on Davis. TOMBSTONE. BRAINBUSTER. AWESOMES. Big chaotic finish, and DANNY DAVIS PINS BULLDOG. With a shot to the head with the megaphone, but he wins regardless. Ok stuff. Nothing great. *.

Match 8 – Butch Reed Vs Koko B Ware – Well this match just screams MID-SOUTH, and that’s awesome. Well… this was super short. Reed wins. Uhhh… they did some stuff. DUD.

Match 9 – Randy Savage Vs Ricky Steamboat – Finally, something not only fun but something fucking GREAT. IC title on the line too. First title match so far for WM? I think so. Tag champs were in a 6 man. No women’s title match (was the belt around still?), and the WWF title match still to come. And that’s all the belts. Savage injured the throat of Steamboat, so Steamboat is out for revenge, and the BEST revenge he can extract on Savage is to take the IC title, something he treasures more than perhaps even Elizabeth. Great promos from both men prior to the match. I always kinda thought this wasn’t that great because I thought it was stupid that Steamboat never really brought the HATE to Savage after everything that happened. However, that was because the Tagged Classic version I had didn’t include the promos or build up, which is crucial to understanding the story of this match imo. Plus I’ve seen them have one hell of a fucking FIGHT a month earlier in Toronto I think (a match I currently think is slightly better than this one), and Steamboat didn’t win, so instead he’s concentrating on WINNING THE BELT rather than destroying Savage and trying to win the belt at the same time. Say what you want about Savage scripting his matches entirely, but fuck, he knows how to make a match fucking GOOD. Steamboat looks great early on with those epic arm drags, then Savage brings out his vicious side and really works over Steamer, even getting some shots in on the throat when he can. Savage is concerned about keeping his title, so he keeps launching Steamboat over the ropes in hopes of a count out. Steamer is awesome as the FIP, which is why he was a face for his ENTIRE career. He just sells the punishment perfectly and you feel for the guy. Then when he makes a comeback, his faster paced moveset gets you going and then you really hate the heel when he cuts him off. Steamboat finally gets his chance to make a big come back, and begins to roll up Savage in as many different ways as possible, working the story of Steamboat wanting to WIN THE TITLE to extract his revenge. Awesome. Crowd are into every near fall too. Ref bump. Savage hits the elbow and gets the “phantom win” which isn’t the best thing for a HEEL to do because it gives them a legitimate reason to claim they were the better man and should have won lol. But Savage decides that since the ref is down, and he technically had this won, he’ll use the ring bell to fuck up Steamboat and possibly end his career once and for all! Savage’s WM opponent from last year, George the animal Steele is out with Steamboat and saves him from being taken out with the ring bell. Another roll up, and Steamboat gets his revenge! New IC champ! Great match, holds up real well. I still don’t consider it one of the best matches ever or anything, but it’s definitely fucking grea. ****1/4.

Match 10 – Jake Roberts Vs The Honky Tonk Man – This feud was built around Honky Tonk Man hitting Jake Roberts in the head with a guitar, which, just like the DDT on the floor to Steamboat, caused a legitimate injury. The guitar was a real one, and not the type we see today that are made to easily break when you hit someone with them. The shot to Jake’s head injured his neck pretty badly, but Jake continued to wrestler without getting it seen to for quite a while. The match begins as a brawl, and it was funny to see Roberts use a knee lift on Honky Tonk this early on, with Honky getting right back up, as it used to be Jake’s finisher before he invented the DDT! Speaking of knee litfs… Honky is in the corner, and Jake comes running at him, and Honey gets his knee up. Jake goes face first into it, and DAMN does it look nasty lol. I can’t tell for sure, but it really did seem like the knee connected pretty hard with Jake’s face! That was the turning point for Honky Tonk Man, who gains control of the match, along with the help of the steel ring post on the outside lol. Every time Jake tries to get back into the ring, HTM keeps knocking him off the apron, causing Jake to fall back onto the guard rail at one point, causing more pain to the back of Jake, that was originally hurt by the steel ring post earlier. Shake, Rattle and Roll (not Road Dogg’s move btw lol) attempt from HTM, who is looking to end it, is countered by Jake into a back body drop, and now we see the comeback of The Snake! The crowd pick up now, as they cheer on the beatdown of HTM at the hands of Jake Roberts! Jake signals for the DDT, and the crowd go wild! Jimmy Hart, who is in the corner of HTM, grabs Jake’s leg though, allowing HTM to roll up Jake, use the ropes for leverage, and get the pin! Nice pacing to this match, which started off fast to get the crowd going, then slowed down a little as the heel dominated, then sped up towards the end for the finish. Nothing too special, but again, this was a fun match, and still pretty solid. **1/2.

Match 11 – Iron Sheik & Nikolai Volkoff Vs The Killer Bees – Hacksaw attacks Volkoff because he’s singing the Russian national anthem. Why? Because they are in AMERICA, and you’d better not be patriotic towards your own country in America dammit! LOL. Boy was this dull. DUD.

Match 12 – Hulk Hogan Vs Andre The Giant. WWF Title on the line, and like the commentators say, this is quite possibly the BIGGEST MATCH EVER. Even today it’s hard to argue against it. Wanted to skip this completely and give it a NO rating, but given its significance, I felt I should watch it. Hogan tries to slam Andre in the first 20 seconds but doesn’t manage it. Andre gets a 2 count but thinks it was a 3. Hogan is now hurting. This is near the end of Andre’s run, and he’s barely able to move now. A lot of people think this is how Andre always was, which is such a shame. Anyway. Hogan was never the greatest in ring performer, so he can’t exactly carry Andre to a good match here. Only thing this has going for it is the fans and how much they LOVE Hogan. Slam heard around the world. Leg drop. It’s over. Lasts 12 minutes. 12 long excruciating minutes. Urgh. As significant as this match is, it’s a pile of utter shite too. 1/4*.

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