Rebellion 2000 Ramblings

Posted on: November 24th, 2013 by Big Cal

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Rebellion 2000

I like how they cut together a video package essentially using promos from the build up to Unforgiven :lmao. Worked out well I guess lol, plus it’s all they had to work with because they didn’t exactly hype this show on TV I don’t think, since America didn’t get it until like a year later on that month PPV service thingy.

Foley promo to start things. Just to tell us that HHH isn’t on the show. Because he wasn’t in the main event. Oh and the 4 way match for the WWF title is now No DQ and no countouts. Because we often see those 4 way matches end like that…

Angle shows up. Can’t be wasting PPV time on matches after all! Angle making fun of Englishmen not winning gold medals. Bet he looks back at this and regrets saying it :p. Tazz and JR are doing commentary.

T&A Vs The Dudley Boys Vs Edge & Christian – Elimination Tables Match

:mark: TRISH FAP FAP.

BIG VIS sign in the crowd. PETE GAS too. Man, Sheffield fans are awesome! Well, they are when I’m in the crowd. Wish they still did the UK PPV’s. They stopped doing them the same year I started going to shows. Cunts.

ALBERT KICKS A TABLE IN HALF! Take THAT furniture!

Test had an awesome big boot. One of like, 3 things he was good at. But I liked T&A. Great team.

:lmao at Edge. Tags himself in after Test hits the big boot, kicks Bubba a few times on the floor, then when Bubba starts to get back up he runs and tags Test back in and runs out of the ring again.

Edge & Christian see an opportunity to take out T&A who have been DOMINATING this match so far, and end up powerbombing Albert through a table while he was trying to superplex Bubba. Why are T&A always the first team to get eliminated in matches like this? I WANT MORE T&A DAMMIT!!! At least let TRISH stay at ringside.

DEVON KICKS A TABLE… but it doesn’t break. He’s no Albert.

With T&A gone we get a standard E&C Vs Dudley Boys tag, but a standard match between those guys is like a fucking classic match compared to what we see today from anyone but THE SHIELD. Fun little finishing stretch, then Christian saves Edge from a 3-D by running into him, then stands up and takes the 3-D through a table himself. Good match overall.

Rating: ***
CAL SCALE – 2

LITA LITA LITA LITA FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH interview.

Ivory Vs Lita – WWF Women’s Championship Match

Lita got busted open at Survivor Series :( but she gets another shot at the title tonight :).

Tazz wants to see Ivory nude. Can’t say I’d complain if I saw it too :p.

Why is Steven Richards always at ringside with Ivory but the Hardy Boys never come out to support Lita? If I was associated with LITA she’d have to get a restraining order out to keep me away! And trust me, she WOULD get the restraining order :p.

Match is like, a MILLION times less sloppy than their SS match. LITA SUICIDE DIVE TO WHITE SOCKS. It’s short as fuck, but they don’t fuck up shit constantly so for the time it gets and given the fact it’s a WWF women’s match, it’s fine. Screwy finish and Ivory retains.

LITA :)

Rating: *3/4
CAL SCALE – 0.5

FINALLY THE ROCK HAS COME BACK TO SHEFFIELD. Now hurry up and fuck off you numpty. He does a promo/interviewy thing. Same old shit.

Perry Saturn Vs Steve Blackman – WWF Hardcore Championship Match

:mark: YES! Hardcore title match :mark:. After Unforgiven we didn’t get a hardcore title match on normal PPV until NO WAY OUT 2001. RR match doesn’t count :p.

Perry Saturn hits ONE OF DEM MEXICAN MOVES over the ropes to Blackman. :lmao @ Tazz. Almost as bad as me and the Japanese A Vs Japanese B thing.

They do some cool shit early on with moves, then outcome the weapons and things go from eeeee to EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE kinda fun. Fuck me at Saturn drop toe holding Blackman into the trash can. Blackman’s head smacks it and damn, not often a trash can shot looks that painful :p.

Saturn probably does his best “wrestling” in this match than I recall seeing in WWF. Combine that with the weapons and damn, guaranteed FUN.

Saturn does the suicide dive through the ropes into a weapon spot. But it’s a metal tray rather than a chair which just doesn’t seem as impactful lol. Looks cool at least :).

STICKS~! No not the the band. The weapons.

Martial Arts kick to the chair that smacks into Saturn’s face and this is done. :mark: this was fun. GOD I FUCKING MISS THE HARDCORE TITLE DAMMIT.

Rating: **3/4
CAL SCALE – 1

William Regal Vs Crash Holly – WWF European Championship Match

Great promo from Regal backstage before the match. He both manages to get over as a babyface AND rip apart England… and STILL get cheered afterwards :lmao.

MOLLY HOLLY’S TITS.

:lmao Regal continues his promo in the ring before the match starts too. Awesome.

:lmao at the “CHYNA I’M PREGNANT” sign.

DAMN at those stiff elbow shots in the corner. Regal is definitely upping his game a little being in England. Everything he did looked nasty. While normally in the US he wasn’t quite as vicious for the first few months in the company.

Regal gets a 3 count but Crash’s foot was on the ropes. Ref talks to someone and MOLLY hits a dropkick. Crash pins Regal and wins the European title. MOLLY BEAT REGAL.

:lmao Regal fucking DECKS MOLLY and starts kicking her in the head :lmao.

Rating: **1/4
CAL SCALE – 1

Angle is backstage with Benoit, asking him for his support in the 4 way title match tonight. Benoit got bigger fish to fry tonight, Kurt.

Chyna & Billy Gunn Vs Eddie Guerrero & Dean Malenko

:lmao Eddie is awesome. That is all :).

CHYNA PRESSING EDDIE OVERHEAD.

Teddy Long refereeing. Duh. Tag match.

Tazz keeps calling Chyna’s man tits “biscuits”. Shut up, Tazz.

Stuff happens in this match, but honestly I was too busy cringing at Tazz’s HORRIBLE commentary. He was fine up until this point. Then for some reason Chyna confused him and he went to hell.

Match is what it is. And what it is I don’t know.

Rating: 1/2*
CAL SCALE – 0

Kane Vs Chris Jericho

Match is announced as a “one fall to a finish” match. Well duh. Unless it’s a fucking 2/3 falls or Iron Man match then yeah, of course that’s what it fucking is.

:mark: this match is more like their SS match and less like their LMS match. FIGHT. There’s a little sequence with Jericho charging at Kane only to be punched in the face, followed by Jericho getting back up and doing the same thing again… well on about the 4th punch, Jericho doesn’t so much bump off the punch as just run into Kane’s fist and collapse :lmao. Think he might have taken a real shot to the face there :p.

Y2GAY sign. Ha.

I started to become a Jericho fan around this time, because my parents bought me a Jericho t-shirt and I didn’t wanna tell them I hated him :p. So as I pretended to like him any time he came on screen, I started paying more attention to him and started actually liking him for the most part lol. Imagine if they’d bought me a ROCK t-shirt? I’d have told them to take it fucking back 8*D.

CHOKESLAM. This one is over. Jericho attacks Kane after the match. Good stuff, but essentially just a short version of their SS match.

Rating: **3/4
CAL SCALE – 1

LITA FAP FAP FAP AND TRISH FAP FAP FAP BACKSTAGE FIGHT ALL SEXY AND HALF NAKED AND FAP FAP FAP IVORY HALF NAKED TOO FAP FAP FAP.

The Goodfather & Bull Buchanan Vs The Hardy Boys – WWF Tag Team Championship Match

No LITA at ringside after her backstage brawl :(.

Jeff starts showing up Bull by doing all his flippy shit and taking him down and stuff. Then he celebrates too near the RTC corner and Goodfather fucking KILLS HIM with a super clothesline :lmao.

Not to be outdone by his brother, Matt tries to commit suicide or something by lobbing himself face first into the ring post. Good stuff :).

Basic tag match, nothing worth going out of your way to see. Val helps his RTC buddies and that’s that.

Rating: **
CAL SCALE – 0.5

Kurt is talking with E&C, trying to get their moral support for the match later. Christian is too hurt from going through the table.

Undertaker on his way to the ring, but Benoit distracts him and the Radicals attack the American Bad Ass! They destroy his knee.

Chris Benoit Vs The Undertaker

They tease Undertaker not being able to make it out, but he comes limp(Bizkit)ing his way down to the ring anyway!

So Undertaker has the knee problem going into the match, and Benoit obviously goes after it. However not enough damage was done and Undertaker can still dictate a lot of the pace in the match. :lmao at Benoit trying to wrap Undertaker’s leg around the ring post, only for ‘Taker to smash his head into the post. Benoit’s bump and subsequent fall looks hilariously awesome with the steel steps preventing you from seeing where he lands. Might make a GIF for it if I can be arsed. We’ll see.

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Yeah, I made the gif :).

Undertaker keeps going to his power to control the match, but any time he thinks his knee is ok again, Benoit spots an opening and just tears at it some more.

We get a somewhat lengthy (given the entire length of the match anyway) control segment with Benoit doing a pretty good job of destroying Undertaker’s leg. HEADBUTT TO THE KNEE. GOAT. Then Undertaker hits a small package and gets the quick 3!!! THE UNDERTAKER HAD TO USE A SMALL PACKAGE. Similar match to the FL Angle match, except Undertaker was able to destroy Kurt at the end. Here he had to resort to a fucking roll up. BENOIT GETS PUT OVER AGAIN!

Good match, but damn, this needed to happen on a big stage a few years later. Hell even in 02 it could have been magnificent. But 05 onwards? Hell motherfucking yeah. Would have been epic.

Rating: ***
CAL SCALE – 2

Kurt Angle Vs Rikishi Vs The Rock Vs Steve Austin – WWF Championship Match

Rock and Austin take turns at fighting Angle in the ring and fighting Rikishi on the outside. Then they double team Rikishi. Angle in the mean time fucks off with the WWF title. Rock goes after him which makes no sense. LET HIM LEAVE. More chance of winning a triple threat than a 4 way ya dumb fuck. God I hate The Rock!

LOL at Rikishi fucking up a “whip opponents into each other out of the corner” spot when he decides to fall out of the ring instead of into the corner. Poor Rock is mid-whipping Angle on the other side and has to quickly switch it up and lob Angle outside.

AUSTIN AND ROCK STAREDOWN. STUNNER TO THE ROCK. EVERYONE TRIES TO COVER THE ROCK. NOBODY LIKES THE ROCK. LOL.

Austin is just killing it in this match. Absolute fucking WORKHORSE. He never slows down, starting with running to the ring to start this thing off, right up until the end. He’s always in the action and always doing something great. ROCK BOTTOM TO AUSTIN. BOOOOO.

ANGLE SLAM TO ROCK. YEY!

Edge & Christian show up to show moral support for Angle anyway. AWWWW THEY DO LOVE KURT AFTERALL!

The Radicals show up next to give Angle more moral support because, well, E&C just weren’t enough lol. Rock and Austin are busy with all the interference, allowing Angle to hit the Angle Slam on Rikishi and retain his title!

This was fun. Nonstop action with very little of the “2 in 2 out” formula. A lot of the time all 4 guys, or at least 3 of them were in the ring at the same time trying to kill each other.

Angle retains the title but Austin and Rock hit finishers on the Radicals to let the fans go home happy.

Rating: ***
CAL SCALE – 2

Overall CAL SCALE – 9

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