Backlash 2004 PPV Ramblings

Posted on: September 28th, 2014 by Big Cal

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Backlash 2004

 

WM main event rematch! Hardcore match! And… nothing else I remember!

 

Shelton Benjamin Vs Ric Flair

This is during Benjamin’s first big singles push where he beat TRIPLE H TWO WEEKS IN A ROW.

FLAIR WAS WINNING TITLES THE SAME YEAR BENJAMIN WAS BORN. Dayum lol. Flair is OLD. And still more awesome than 90% of the wrestling world.

So the early going of this is Flair trying to show Shelton up because he’s a newb and Flair is GOD, but Shelton has the amateur wrestling ability, youth and athleticism on his side allowing him to constantly show up Flair.

If simply being a VETERAN isn’t enough to put Flair in control… then maybe some DIRTY TACTICS will! THUMB TO THE EYE~! And the fans are eating it all up. MUCH LOVE FOR THE NATURE BOY IN CANADA!

Match structure definitely reminds me of an old school Flair main event match. He’s fighting from underneath as he lets his opponent show him up and out shine him early on, then one mistake later and Flair is working over the leg. This could have been a pretty sweet title match back in the day. Shelton in STING’S position? Yes please. Aaaaand now I want Shelton Vs Vader lol.

Fuck me, Lawler brought up that Flair was gonna take Shelton to school here tonight… and I’ll be damned if BOTH Lawler and JR don’t run that whole analogy into the fucking GROUND lol. Especially when Flair grabs a chair. Sweet jebus :lmao.

Ouch, Flair does his over the turnbuckle spot… then slips off the apron. Surprised he didn’t hurt his leg there.

BRASS KNUCKS~! But Shelton hits a Stinger Splash and knocks them off. Flying clothesline… and this is over with. Lol. Wait… Stinger Splash? SHELTON REALLY SHOULD HAVE TAKEN STING’S SPOT!!! :p

Match started off fun… then half way into it, it just fell apart and the finish ended up being really FLAT. Shame because this was looking to be good at one point.

Rating: **
CAL SCALE – 0.5

 

Orton promo. Says he’s the longest reigning IC champ in SEVEN YEARS. Wait… hasn’t he only held the title for 5 months? DAMN lol. Good promo by Orton. I miss this Orton :(. COME BACK GOOD ORTON.

 

The Coach Vs Tajiri

ARM DRAG BY COACH~! KICK BY TAJIRI~!

Coach runs away after getting kicked a few times, then Tajiri misses a kick and ends up cracking his leg on the ring post! Love how Coach looked too confused to capitalise on it straight away, playing into the REAL fact that he’s not a wrestler. Or at least he wasn’t until tonight. SOMEONE GONE TRAINED THE COACH!

:mark: Tajiri kicking out of a leg submission on the mat :mark:.

Crowd are kinda stunned + bored + WTF for all of this :lmao.

Tajiri sells the leg well and KICKS~! awesome when he’s making his comeback. Coach does surprisingly well, and GETS THE WIN… after Garrison Cade decks Tajiri in the face.

This ain’t awful!

Rating: **
CAL SCALE – 0.5

 

Chris Jericho Vs Christian & Trish Stratus

So what did we learn from this feud? TRISH LIKES IT ROUGH.

Also, that there must have been a time where Vince didn’t HATE Christian. He beat JERICHO at WRESTLEMANIA XX. Pretty fecking huge tbh lol. And then a year and a half later, Christian leaves for TNA because WWE don’t seem to want him :(.

“HOW CAN YOU LOOK AT TRISH STRATUS AND NOT HAVE HARD FEELINGS?” :lmao

Oh man at the start of this :lmao. Jericho decks Christian, leaving Trish all alone, so he just SMILES at her and she runs like fuck to get away :lmao.

:lmao at Trish’s reaction when Jericho knocks her off the apron.

TRISH GETS TAGGED IN~! CHICK KICK TO JERICHO~!

ACCIDENTAL HEADBUTT TO CHRISTIAN’S BALLS~!

TRISH GETS SPANKED~!

FUCK ME at Christian’s bump from the bulldog!

Might I just say at this point, that this match has been rather dull and uneventful outside of the spots I’ve mentioned in CAPS. A massive step down from their incredible WM match.

Match ends… with an enzeguri.

BOOOORING and crappy. Shocked and disappointed.

Rating: *
CAL SCALE – 0

 

Eugene backstage looking at a divas magazine, then walking into the divas locker room and seeing Gail Kim in her underwear. And Molly Holly without her wig. Regal is awesome though :lmao.

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Victoria Vs Lita – WWE Women’s Championship Match

FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP NO.

Rating: NO
CAL SCALE – -1

 

Randy Orton Vs Mick Foley – WWE Intercontinental Championship No Holds Barred Match

:mark:

Orton has considered this one of his best matches ever, and Foley to my knowledge still considers this his absolute best, beating out the Mind Games match with HBK. Never thought THAT highly of it myself, but it’s still been a match I thought was fucking great. As long as it holds up I’ll be happy happy happy.

Love the chaotic start to this one, with Foley going after Orton with BARBIE, and Orton avoiding it at all costs. We have a camera man getting dizzy trying to keep up which adds to the whole experience, then he even falls over which is awesome too lol.

TRASH CAN TO THE HEAD~! Foley’s brain cells are going… going… GONE!

Damn, Foley is IN SHAPE here! He looks better than he did for… well… his entire WWF/E career lol. I know that after his disappointment at WM, he really got into shape for this, but I forgot how THIN the guy looked lol.

BACK SUPLEX ON THE STEEL RAMPWAY. Foley’s head CRACKS. Ouch!

ANOTHER back bump on the rampway by Foley. It’s almost like he HATES his own brain cells lol!

MR SOCKO~! Hmmm… seems out of place in this kind of match though. What to do… what to do… GIVE MR SOCKO BARBIE~! RIGHT TO THE FACE OF RANDY ORTON~! RANDY ORTON IS BLEEDING!!!

:mark: Foley throwing punches to the open wound :mark:. Is it weird that I always :mark: for that kind of stuff? :p

Orton is bleeding and keeps getting his face torn apart by barbed wire. So Foley gives him a break… and legdrops Barbie into his testicles! :D

FIRE~! FOLEY HAS GASOLINE AND A LIGHTER~! HE’S GONNA SET BARBIE ON FIRE~!

Aaaaaand then Bischoff comes out and stops him, saying the PPV would get shut down if he does. So like, was the fire a planned spot but they later found out they couldn’t do it so they did that? Or did they just plan the “can’t do it” spot? Either way it seemed… pointless.

Well, if fire can’t be used, might as well up the usage of BARED WIRE, with a big wooden board COVERED in the stuff!!!

ORTON JUST THREW TESTICLE DUST IN FOLEY’S FACE~! Seriously… where the FUCK did that come from?

BODY SLAM ONTO THE BARBED WIRE BOARD~! Foley starting to get a taste of his own medicine. And it tastes metallic and possibly bloody.

Fuck me sideways they REALLY fucking teased Orton going into the barbed wire board lol. I mean, they did it before when Orton threw the TESTICLE DUST to escape, but those Irish Whip reversals were DAMN CLOSE lol. I’ve seen this fucking match before and I STILL thought he was going into it :lmao.

THUMBTACKS~! Orton signalling for an RKO… BUT FOLEY REVERSES~!

ORTON BACK FIRST INTO THE FUCKING THUMBTACKS~! Orton’s reaction is fucking HILARIOUSLY AWESOME :mark:.

Randy runs the FUCK AWAY because, who the hell wouldn’t? Up to the rampway and… ORTON GETS THROWN OFF THE RAMP THROUGH SOME WOODEN STAGE CONVENIENTLY SET UP THERE~!

Foley is jealous that Orton got to have so much fun, so he decides to ELBOW DROP off the stage :). FUN~!

Fucking hell the camera angle for the elbow drop makes me CRINGE every time, because there is a bit of wood that’s now a VERY SHARP POINTY THING and Foley’s head comes dangerously fucking close lol.

ORTON STILL KICKS OUT~! Crazy to think that Foley MADE TWO MEMBERS OF EVOLUTION with crazy hardcore style matches. And he did it with HHH TWICE, once as a mid-carder when HHH was moving away from the rich snob gimmick and again as a full blown main eventer. FOLEY IS GOD.

Back in the ring and… MR SOCKO IS BACK~! MANDIBLE CLAW~!

EUROPEAN UPPERCUT TO ESCAPE~!

RIGHT BACK INTO A MANDIBLE CLAW~!

COUNTERED INTO AN RKO~!

:lmao poor ref did a 2 count in thumbtacks. Bet he’s glad the match didn’t end there.

RKO ON BARBIE~! ORTON WINS!!!

Match is still fucking great, but I still don’t think as highly of it as most people. Prefer the WM 22 match with Foley/Edge as far as post Foley retirement hardcore matches go. Still, this really helped MAKE Orton and showed that he was more than just a pretty boy 3rd generation wrestler.

Rating: ****
CAL SCALE – 5

 

La Resistance Vs The Hurricane & Rosey

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha no.

Rating: NO
CAL SCALE – -1

 

Kane Vs Edge

Remember when Edge returned after being out for over a year… then broke his hand straight away :lmao.

Kane targets the broken hand :mark:. Kane punches the broken hand that’s still in a cast then sells his own hand :mark:.

Edge is back in Canada and the fans don’t give a SHIT. LOL. Edge does absolutely NOTHING for a good while though. Punches Kane a bunch of times at the start of the match because… I dunno, he’s returned as a brawler now? Either way he’s been a steaming pile of what I’ll produce a little later on in the toilet after eating a Sunday dinner :).

:lmao at Lawler’s call for Edge’s “Edgecution” aka the lifting DDT he was using AS A FINISHER before he got injured “that’s something there…”.

Cast to Kane, followed by a Spear and this is over. Short and shit.

Rating: 1/4*
CAL SCALE – 0

 

Chris Benoit Vs Triple H Vs Shawn Michaels – World Heavyweight Championship Match

WM rematch! I’ve never been able to sit through this in full in YEARS. It’s kinda like Rock/Jericho from the 02 RR… regardless of how good it is (or could be, fuck knows what I think to it these days lol), it just PUTS ME TO SLEEP. I managed to overcome my sleep issues with Rock/Jericho and enjoyed that match. Is today the day I finally watch this in full? I hope so, wanna get this out of the way lol.

Match starts off fun and full of energy. Crowd finally give a shit about something (Benoit) which helps too. Everyone is beating the shit out of each other with punches and CHOPS, and man oh man Benoit’s chops are LETHAL.

Is Benoit the best “fall out of sight from a bump” guy? :p I remember the one from Rebellion 2000 (check my ramble for it gif of it)… and now this:

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I *think* the fans keep chanting “you screwed Bret” at HBK… but it sounds more like “you sold out” :lmao. Damn Canadians and their crazy accent. What’s that all aboot?

:lmao HBK spazzes out after a diving headbutt. Flops around like a fish out of water. There’s selling a move and then there’s HBK flopping a move :p.

HUGE POP FOR THE SHARPSHOOTER!

CROSSFACE TO HBK! BUT NO REFEREE, SO BENOIT GIVES UP~!

SHARPSHOOTER BY HBK~! IN CANADA~! TO A CANADIAN~! IN A TITLE MATCH~! AND EARL HEBNER SHOWS UP~! :lmao Gotta <3 WWE sometimes lol.

Big “let’s go Benoit” chant from the crowd… until HHH drops him on his head with a DDT and everyone shuts up :lmao.

“THEY’VE SEEN BENOIT CHOKE BEFORE MANY TIMES”

Oh god then IMMEDIATELY after that Lawler mentions his wife at ringside has seen him choke many times too :|. Akwaaaard…

TABLE SPOT~! :lmao that was the fucking dumbest shit I’ve seen HBK do in a LONG TIME :lmao. He basically does a DIVING ELBOW DROP through the table… but HHH and Benoit ARE STOOD UP AND FIGHTING IN FRONT OF THE TABLE. What the FUCK was he attempting to achieve? :lmao JR claims he was going for a cross body. Yeah ok. LOL.

At least in this match though someone other than Benoit gets taken out for a bit. I don’t think I could manage with another HBK Vs HHH segment. I still have Bad Blood HIAC to get through. That’s gonna take everything I’ve got to not shoot myself half way through. Would have preferred HHH took himself out so we got HBK Vs Benoit…

“ASSHOOOOOLE” Canadians are funneh :).

Jebus, Lawler CONTINUES TO CALL BENOIT A CHOKER throughout this match.

Match gets boring around this time tbh. HHH is super slow and methodical but not doing anything particularly good or interesting so it just because SLOW AND DULL. Oh great, HBK comes back and Benoit ends up on the outside and we are “treated” to HBK Vs HHH for a little while…

No wonder I’ve always given up on this match lol :lmao. HHH control segment followed up with HHH Vs HBK? Urgh :p.

SWEET CHIN MUSIC TO BENOIT~!

LOW BLOW TO HBK~!

MR SLEDGEHAMMER~!

Poor HBK gets a shot to the back.

:lmao HHH goes head first into the ring post and… lands in the crowd :lmao.

SWEET CHIN MUSIC~! COUNTERED INTO A SHARPSHOOTER~!

HBK taps. BENOIT WINS.

Eh. Huge step down from their WM match, which I don’t think is exactly the GOAT WM match or anything either lol. First half is mostly good, but the second half gets dull as shit.

Rating: ***
CAL SCALE – 2

 

Overall CAL SCALE – 7

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