Unforgiven 2001 Ramblings

Posted on: January 19th, 2014 by Big Cal

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WWF Unforgiven 2001

I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU!!!

The Hardy Boys Vs The Hurricane & Lance Storm Vs Spike Dudley & The Big Show Vs The Dudley Boys – WWF Tag Team Championship Elimination Match

:lmao how fucking RANDOM is the team of Hurricane and Storm… WAIT I JUST GOT IT!!! :lmao (totally serious btw, I only JUST got it when I typed that out :lmao ).

Big Show and Jeff Hardy knock the Dudleys off the apron before they can make it into the ring. Show goes out after them while Jeff looks like he’s gonna follow… then doesn’t. Then the other babyfaces just kinda stand and watch Big Show attack both Dudley Boys on his own :p.

:lmao Bubba gets in with Spike, and starts to line himself up for a big elbow drop… then just stops, walks over to Spike and STANDS ON HIS HEAD. What a PRICK :mark:.

HURRICANE WITH THE HURRICAPE! OMG HE JUST FLEW!

Spike dives off of Show’s shoulders to the outside. Looks impressive. Then BIG SHOW points at the corner and starts to climb!!! Then Bubba cuts him off :(.

HURRICANE GONNA CHOKESLAM THE BIG SHOW!!! Or not. Storm gets a chokeslam though, and there go the New Natural Disasters.

Wanna play a game? It’s called “guess who the referee is for this FOUR TEAM ELIMINATION TAG MATCH”. Answers can be sent on the back of a postcard to

PO BOX Obvious
Wrestling Answer
Duhville
Who Else But Teddy Long
WWE 123

Spike just got pinned while I wrote that. Nobody cares.

Just found the gif for this ramble:

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:lmao at Teddy Long taking a stupid amount of time to go for a cover before he was waiting for Jeff to climb the ropes. Then Jeff breaks up the count with a Swanton to D-Von’s LEGS.

Those DAMN DUDLEYS get the win with a BUBBA BOMB.

Match is alright. Nothing special, nothing bad.

Rating: **
CAL SCALE – 0.5

STEPHANIE (fap fap) is OFFERING HER SERVICES to RVD tonight. She wants to know if she can help in ANY way. He turns her down. The fuck is up with him? He high or something? Actually he probably is…

KURT ANGLE’S MUM. ERIC ANGLE. ANGLE’S FAMILY. LOOK AT HOW MUCH IT LOOKS LIKE I CARE BECAUSE I’M WRITING IN CAPS. WAIT NOT ERIC ANGLE, THIS IS DAVE. DAVE ANGLE.

Perrty Saturn Vs Raven

This match has come about because Raven and Terri killed Moppy. THEY KILLED MOPPY! THOSE BASTARDS!!!

“THE MAN IS FIGHTING OVER THE MEMORY OF A MOP!”

Somewhat decent brawl match thingy. Saturn wins. Moppy is still dead. Who cares?

Rating: 1/2*
CAL SCALE – 0

Edge Vs Christian – WWF Intercontinental Championship Match

CHRISTIAN! CHRISTIAN! AT LAST! YOU’RE ON! YOU’RE OWN!!!

Edge is angry. Lots of HATE~! and then Christian makes him look retarded by getting him to charge full steam ahead at him in the corner, only for Christian to move and Edge to smash into the ring post. LOL.

Edge is bleeding and I don’t know why. Nothing has happened to warrant blood, so must have happened the hard way by accident. But fuck knows when lol.

Match seems far too back and forth-y to me, but not in a “they are brothers and know each other so well” way. Just a “oh look Edge is in control. And now Christian is in control. Back to Edge” kinda way.

Christian goes for a Conchairto. Edge sweeps out his legs, then goes got it himself, only for the referee to take the chair away. Christian low blows Edge with the other chair, and WINS THE IC CHAMPIONSHIP!

Well this kinda sucked. Can’t say I ever thought they had much chemistry as opponents tbh. Never liked this match much, don’t think anything to their ladder match (I’ll get to that soon), and didn’t even think their Raw… 2010(?) match was anything special either.

Rating: 1/2*
CAL SCALE – 0

The Undertaker & Kane Vs Kronik – WCW Tag Team Championship Match

Fuck, thought this match happened at No Mercy. Thought I was gonna be able to avoid it for a little while still :(.

CRUSH & ADAM BOMB VS UNIBOMB & MEAN MARK CALLOUS.

Weird seeing Undertaker holding the WCW tag belts.

:lmao with the exception of a few punches and kicks (but certainly not all of them…), Kronik seem to fuck up EVERYTHING they do. It all looks terrible. Either fake as shit or botched to hell or both.

This isn’t TERRIBLE or “worst match ever” kind of bad, just dull when Kronik are in control, and filled with hilarious botches thanks to Kronik :p. Undertaker getting legitimately fucked off towards the end is awesome.

Steven Richards stuff after the match is awesome at least.

Rating: 1/2*
CAL SCALE – 0

STEPHANIE (fap fap fap fap fap) backstage looking for RVD to once again tell him that his experience in the Alliance with be a pleasurable one if he beats Jericho tonight. I like how STEPHANIE asks COACH, a WWF guy, where RVD’s locker room is and they both act like the very best of friends :p.

RVD Vs Chris Jericho – WWF Hardcore Championship Match

Hardcore title match :mark:.

They do a bunch of mat work early on, all basic stuff but looks good I guess. Doesn’t really do anything or mean anything though. I did have to laugh at Jericho having to tell the referee to COUNT at one point. Another reason Jericho hates Tim White…

Jericho smashes RVD’s arm into the ring post 3 times in a row, then suplexes him ON A LADDER. 10 seconds later RVD has enough strength in his arm and shit to counter another suplex on the ladder into his own. Good old RVD…

:lmao at Tim White running over when Jericho looks to try for the Walls, just because at the same time RVD’s shoulders are down and he doesn’t want Jericho to scream at him again :p.

KICK TO THE FACE. Jericho is busted open. I swear he’s the third person so far on this show to bleed around the eye somewhere lol.

:lmao at RVD purposely bending over on top of the ladder so Jericho can throw the chair into his face. WALLS OF JERICHO ON THE LADDER~! The bump RVD takes off the ladder to the outside afterwards looks more impressive tbh. As does Jericho’s bump off the ladder into the barricade when RVD moves!

Pfft, RVD, what a pussy. Gets his hands up on a suicide dive when Jericho holds up a chair. Benoit never got his hands up and look how he turned out!

ARMBAR~!

STEPAHNIE FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP. She comes down to help RVD, Jericho nearly decks her with a chair (what a CUNT btw), but she ducks and RVD kicks him in the face. 5 Star Frog Splash and STEPHANIE gets an early birthday present!

This is really good overall. Couple of dodgy bits here and there, but nothing to ruin the match. Glad this held up because I liked it a lot on my last watch.

Rating: ***1/2
CAL SCALE – 3

The Rock Vs Booker T & Shane McMahon – WCW Championship Match

Urgh. The Rock. Urgh. Booker T. Yey. Shane McMahon.

RIC FLAIR MENTION. All downhill from here :(.

Booker and Rock do stuff in the ring and it kinda sucks. Shane keeps attacking Rock on the outside and it kinda rocks. This should have been Shane Vs Rock. Would have been good probably.

:lmao at Rock trying to take a snapmare. :lmao at Booker T having some kind of a fit while setting up a knee drop. Christ these guys SUCK. And they ain’t doing nothing to change my opinion in this match lol.

Bah, they set up the Shane elbow off the ropes through a table spot but Rock fucks that up and we don’t see it. People’s Champion my arse. GIVE THE PEOPLE WHAT WE WANT. WE WANT TO SEE YOU GO THROUGH A TABLE AND DIE.

Shane decks Booker with the WCW belt by mistake. Then hits Rock. Shane might make mistakes but he sure makes up for it! :)

KIP UP BY SHANE~!

TEST~! He fucking decks Rock to break up a People’s Elbow attempt (woo) then levels him with a Big Boot. BRADSHAW~! He chases after Test. NICK PATRICK~! The referee actually drags Rock back in the ring :lmao. No bias in this match!

Mike Cheoda (fuck knows how you spell his name) drags Shane off The Rock during a cover! He’s a fair and impartial referee! Then he takes out Nick! Then Booker T takes him out! Rock Bottom. Down comes Earl Henber and he counts the 3.

Shane and the referee stuff were literally the best parts of this match. More Shane was needed to make this match good though. Booker stunk up the joint and Rock was his usual shitty self too. He and Booker did not mix well. Shane stops this being THAT bad though. Terrible for a major title match, but a decentish match overall I guess.

Rating: **
CAL SCALE – 0.5

STACY KEIBLER IN THE BATH FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP.

Rhyno Vs Tajiri – WCW United States Championship

:mark: Totally didn’t remember this was on this show!!!

My god Tajiri’s kicks are epic.

My god Rhyno’s spinebuster is epic.

:lmao at Torrie (fap fap) trying to run in heels, pretty sure she actually hurts herself.

GORE TO TORRIE… STOPPED BY A KICK TO THE FUCKING FACE BY TAJIRI. Now THAT was EPIC.

GORE! GORE! GORE!

This one is over. Rhyno becomes the NEW United States Champion! Second best match of the night so far lol… with one more to go :p. Tons of fun and some ungodly kicks.

Rating: ***
CAL SCALE – 2

Steve Austin Vs Kurt Angle – WWF Championship Match

Awesome video package for this match. Build up was great. Though Angle needs to take better care of his Medals. He got them stolen TWICE in 2001.

Their SummerSlam match was epic (god I can’t wait to watch that again :mark: ). This match is in Angle’s hometown. His family are in the front row. This isn’t too long after the September 11 attack. Angle is the AMERICAN HERO. I wonder who is gonna win…

SD just days before, Austin gave Angle a PILEDRIVER ON THE CONCRETE. Angle showed up at the end of the show to say he couldn’t be stopped. And he’s showing zero effects so far in this match. And you know what? I DON’T GIVE A FUCK. Because the whole angle was just done fantastically and didn’t come across as the big babyface no selling shit and being all superman. I know, crazy right? WWE CAN actually book babyfaces strong without them turning into some generic superman character!

Angle is on FIRE early on, just destroying Austin. Then after a superplex we see Angle hold his neck, showing signs that he might not be 100%. And I like that he started showing pain in the neck there because it was the first move that would actually do damage to it.

Man, Angle is ALL OVER Austin for a large portion of the first half of this one. Beating the shit out of Austin. Throwing Austin off the stage, and then a great callback to SS by smashing Austin face first into the ring post a few times. And then he rips up the mat to expose the concrete floor, but Austin knows exactly what’s about to happen so he charges at Angle and takes him out. He don’t want no Piledriver on the floor! He does however take a back body drop on the floor, then Angle follows up with HEATBUTTS~! Pretty sure Angle busted Austin open the HARD WAY with those.

Angle ends up taking a back body drop on the concrete too and he takes it like a MAN… which makes one SICK fucking sound as his spine cracks on the floor. Now THAT is one hell of a way to transition into Austin’s control segment.

Is this NO DQ? No Countout? Because they’ve been battling outside of the ring for like, 10 minutes now :lmao.

Damn. DDT by Angle and Austin rolls out to the floor… and lands HARD on the concrete. Methinks he might have forgotten about the exposed concrete down there :p.

STUNNER TO AUSTIN!

PILEDRIVER TO ANGLE! Best Piledriver near fall of the decade… until that ROH (I think) match between… 2 guys I can’t remember. SHUT UP IT DOES EXIST. Someone will remind me.

Angle just won’t give up though, and after surviving the Piledriver, he counters a Stunner into the Ankle Lock and AUSTIN TAPS OUT! NEW WWF CHAMPION!!!

Great match, yet still doesn’t hold a candle to their SS encounter. :mark:

Rating: ****1/4
CAL SCALE – 6

Overall CAL SCALE – 12

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