The Great American Bash 2007 PPV Ramblings

Posted on: July 19th, 2015 by Big Cal

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The Great American Bash 2007

 

I remember nothing from this event. Either it’s for a reason (aka the show sucked), or my mind just isn’t what it ice cream.

 

MVP Vs Matt Hardy – WWE United States Championship Match

Time to see if Matt can drag MVP to a good match. If anyone can it’s Matt Hardy, but MVP still sucks so bad even the best wrestlers struggle to do anything decent with him :p.

Well, this was a surprise :mark:. They work a nice, snug competitive match, something you’d see on a regular basis on Smackdown in 2006, and every now and then still in 07, like here.

MVP looks better than usual, but damn, Matt Hardy is on a whole other level. How fucking good is this guy? Still sucks that it was Jeff that ended up being the more popular Hardy and got the big title push :(.

Wish I’d wrote more about this match, but I was too busy simply ENJOYING it :). Best MVP match? Can’t think of anything that comes remotely close tbh. Matt Hardy brings out the absolute best in people. Which makes me wish we got a big match between him and Christian in 2009 on ECW or something, rather than the Hardy Vs Hardy feud lol. They could have torn the fucking house down on any card that year.

So the Playmaker ends the match and MVP retains. God, the Playmaker has to be one of the worst finishers, up there with the People’s Elbow.

Rating: ***3/4
CAL SCALE – 4

 

Dusty Rhodes shows up. Aaand my memory of this event starts to come back. He has a Bullrope match with Orton :lmao. Dusty starts telling a story about cows :lmao. Then he moos. FOR NO REASON :lmao.

 

Jimmy Wang Yang Vs Shannon Moore Vs Funaki Vs Jamie Noble Vs Chavo Guerrero – WWE Cruiserweight Championship Open Match

Cole: “Anyone is eligible for this Cruiserweight open as long as they are Cruiserweights” WELL FUCKING DUH.

I’m rooting for Funaki. Or Moore. Or Noble. Or Yang.

Hornswoggle randomly runs into the ring then hides under it. OH GOD IS THIS WHEN HE WINS AND THE TITLE DISAPPEARS FOREVER?

Typical multi-man CW match. Everyone just keeps running in to hit moves before getting taken out by someone else coming in to hit moves. Yawn.

Yep… Hornswoggle wins the title. Despite never being announced for the match. And thus ends the CW title because Vince is a prick.

Rating: DUD
CAL SCALE – 0

 

The Sandman Vs Carlito – Singapore Cane on a Poll Match

*facepalm*

Rating: NO
CAL SCALE – -1

 

Melina Vs Candice Michelle – WWE Women’s Championship Match

I was considering watching this match when Melina came out. Then I realised who her opponent was.

Rating: NO
CAL SCALE – -1

 

Jeff Hardy Vs Umaga – WWE Intercontinental Championship Match

So Matt Hardy got a great match out of a useless fuckwad like MVP earlier. So surely Umaga can get something good out of Jeff Hardy, who isn’t entirely awful, right?

Lol, the ref tells Umaga to watch the throat after he uppercuts Jeff. HIS FUCKING FINISHER IS A THUMB TO THE THROAT. I don’t think he cares, ref :p.

Umaga is a beat, just destroying Hardy in fun fashion, allowing Jeff to stick to his strength of taking a beating. Aaaaaand then Umaga applies that fucking nerve grip. BAN THE FUCKING NERVE GRIP. AND THE BEARHUG. BAN EM BOTH.

:lmao, had to pause the video to go get a drink, and the moment I clicked play again, I just heard the words “Barbeque sandwich” from JR. NO IDEA WHY HE SAID THOSE WORDS IN THE MIDDLE OF A MATCH :lmao.

Once again the referee tries to make Umaga stop something, this time to stop using the ropes to leap in the air and crush Jeff. Umaga immediately does the exact same thing, only for Jeff to get his knee up and catch Umaga!!! Guess he should have listened to the ref :p.

Hardy is building momentum now, capitalising on Umaga driving his own head into the mat on a missed headbutt! A mix of speed and high flying offence looks to send Jeff to the IC title, but the MONSTER Umaga just doesn’t stop! THE SAMOAN TERMINATOR~!

UMAGA SMASHES HIS OWN HEAD INTO THE RING POST~!

SWANTON BOMB~!

HOLY FUCK UMAGA KICKED OUT~! Genuinely thought the match was over there lol. Don’t remember who wins! :mark:

SUPER KICK~!

BUM SMASH~!

SAMOAN SPIKE~!

Umaga retains his title and comes out looking like a true fucking beast!

Great match! Umaga looked great, Jeff looked great, both guys stuck to what they are best at, and they meshed together tremendously.

Rating: ***3/4
CAL SCALE – 4

 

Liking how they are building up the main event throughout the night with video packages for both men. It’s getting me hyped lol.

 

John Morrison Vs CM Punk – ECW Championship Match

Nice little moment with Punk hitting a Tully Blanchard suplex, here at the Great American Bash.

Wouldn’t be surprised if that was the best part of the match tbh. These two have a bad track record on PPV :p.

Trashy Mess.

Rating: DUD
CAL SCALE – 0

 

Randy Orton Vs Dusty Rhodes – Texas Bullrope Match

I just… no. I have no desire to watch Dusty in his “prime”, never mind in 2007.

Rating: NO
CAL SCALE – -1

 

The Great Khali Vs Kane Vs Batista – World Heavyweight Championship Match

Remember when Kane disguised himself as the Burger King so he could attack Edge, and ended up injuring him? Fun times :p.

And then Khali won the WHC and the fun times were done.

Why do they always have ring announcers tell you how tall someone is ONLY when they are 7ft or above lol? “COMING DOWN TO THE RING, STANDING AROUND 5 FEET TALL, ONE OF THE DIVAS”

Oh ffs, we aren’t even 5 minutes into this and there is a fucking Nerve Grip. HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL THEM TO STOP IT?!?!

Sweet jebus, just when Kane shows up to break the hold… Khali puts it on him too.

Well bugger me, Khali with a Chokeslam? To both men? Did he EVER use that move again lol?

They all end up on the outside and just club the fuck out of each other and the match turns fun for a few moments :). DOUBLE SPINEBUSTER TO KHALI THROUGH THE TABLE~!

Khali sells the table spot for about 2 minutes before getting back in the ring lol.

CHOKESLAM TO KHALI~!

Ya know, I’m actually enjoying this :). Khali isn’t in it much, and Kane and Batista beat the fuck out of each other which is super fun.

Everyone is throwing BOMBS at each other, desperate to win before the third man can show up and break up the cover. :lmao just after I wrote that, JBL says “we’ve got guys throwing BOMBS at each other”. STOP STEALING MY SHIT, JOHN!!! :p

Unfortunately Khali does retain. I was rooting (ROOT) for Kane back in the day.

Yeah, I had fun with this :).

Rating: ***1/4
CAL SCALE – 2

 

Video hyping HHH’s return for SummerSlam. King Booker comes out afterwards. Guessing this is to start their feud. Urgh. He wants Lawler to give up his crown because Booker is the only true King, apparently…

 

John Cena Vs Bobby Lashley – WWE Championship Match

Having a bunch of legends comment on the match for the hype video really makes this match seem HUGE. Wonder how Lashley would have turned out if he didn’t leave WWE.

Big fight feel :mark:.

Starts out like you would expect from a big face vs face match. They lock up, they do the old test of strength spots, then they just go from there.

And where they go from there is having Lashley display his amateur skills and using his power and athleticism to make him look as good of an all rounder and big threat to Cena as possible. All the while Cena does a bit of brawling and throws in some of his awkward “modified” moves.

Terrific spot with Cena avoiding a clothesline from Lashley, and it’s one of those where Lashley looked like he wanted to fucking MUDER Cena with the move, and he would have if it hit, so Cena had to have perfect timing to avoid it, and it was done really well and looked awesome :mark:.

:lmao according to Lawler and JR, Cena has NEVER faced anyone with the kind of wrestling skills that Lashley has. Seems Angle didn’t go to TNA in 06; he was simply removed from existence! Then Lawler follows up with the “especially someone with the kind of strength Lashley has too”. And somewhere Lesnar just bursts out laughing and doesn’t know why. I do, Brock. I do.

Lashley is on top form here, just on the offence all the time, no wasted motion. He exploded out of nowhere with power and smashed Cena’s ribs down onto his shoulder, and form there Lashley focused on the mid-section of the champ.

F-U~! Cena with an F-U out of nowhere, but he’s too fucked up to cover straight away, and Lashley is able to kick out and recover quicker than Cena.

SPEA… STFU~! And it looks as shitty as ever lol :p.

SPEAR~!

KICK OUT~!

So Lashley got to kick out of an F-U, but only after taking almost no damage in the match up to that point, and having Cena wait about a minute before going for the cover. Cena on the other hand, has taken all this punishment and kicks out of a SPEAR straight away. LOL.

SUPER F-U~!

And with that, Cena retains.

Great match here. Made Lashley look like he could really be the FUTURE if he wanted to. Unfortunately, for whatever reason, he didn’t want to and he left. TNA are trying to make him their FUTURE, but being the future of TNA is like getting a promotion at work right before it closes down :p.

The match has a great atmosphere to it as well, with the big fight feel that I love so much, and the crowd being super into it all, but being very, very split as to who they wanted to win. Unusual for Cena to not get booed to shit on PPV in a title match around this time :p.

Rating: ***3/4
CAL SCALE – 4

 

Overall CAL SCALE – 11

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