Cyber Sunday 2006
Yet another 06 PPV that I have to take the wrapping off lol. Think 2 more still have wrapping on too . All Raw shows .
Umaga Vs Kane
So the choice in this match was Umaga’s opponent. Kane, Benoit or Sandman. I enjoyed Kane/Umaga’s brawl at Unforgiven so I’m ok with this decision, however BENOIT Vs Umaga would have been .
Kane won with 49%. Wow lol.
Huh, so these two had another match, a loser leaves Raw match, sending Kane to Smackdown! I guess it makes sense the fans would vote for Kane then, as it wasn’t just their Unforgiven match in their history.
SLUGEST~! AGAIN~! YEY~!
Love Kane’s Uppercut. Makes one epic sound.
RUNNING BUTT ATTACK~! IT WAS SUPER EFFECTIVE!
SAMOAN SPIKE TO THE RINGPOST~! Silly Umaga, that’s not your opponent!
Kane is absolutely trying to cave in the skull of the SAMOAN BULLDOZER .
How great is Estrada on the outside btw? Always cheering on his guy, then when Kane gains control he gets worried and you can see him actually sweating like mad and fanning himself with his hat .
UMAGA HEAD FIRST INTO THE RING POST~! Kinda like Sting in that match with Vader, except Umaga wasn’t trying to hit his finishing move and overshot it or anything retarded like that .
A distraction from Estrada, and the SAMOAN SPIKE puts an end to the Big Red Machine!
Good stuff again! One of these days I’ll look up their Loser Leaves Raw match to see if that was any good too.
CAL SCALE – 2
Sharmell trying to convince Big Show to help Booker T out tonight. Big Show turns her down.
Cryme Tyme Vs Viscera & Charlie Hass Vs The Highlanders Vs Lance Cade & Trevor Murdoch – Texas Tornado Match
Ha, Cryme Tyme are kewl because they ain’t using no I’s in Cryme Tyme. IT’S ALL ABOUT THE Y’S BABY~!
Crazy to think that JTG has ONLY just been released this year . Poor guy. He was living the dream.
Choices were Texas Tornado, Fatal Four Way and Tag Team Turmoil. Glad Texas Tornado won tbh. Can’t imagine this match would have been any good with the other stipulations. Not saying this is guaranteed to be good now, but at least an all out war should be fun, right?
The HIGHlanders with a HIGH risk move. Ha. Get it? HIGH. Speaking of HIGH, it’s Cryme Tyme!
JTG Vs Hass… JTG does a bunch of hippy hoppy moves or something and gets a GERMAN SUPLEX for his troubles. Ha.
SWEET N SOUR~!
Cryme Tyme STEAL the win from Cade and Murdoch. Ha. I get it.
Well this was… fine I guess. Short as fuck. Probably for the best .
Cryme Tyme celebrate with Lawler and JR and steal Lawler’s laptop. JR first bumps Lawler. Awesome.
CAL SCALE – 0.5
HBK constantly pressing a button on a laptop. This leads to one of the GOAT segments ever. HBK RUNNING AROUND SUPERKICKING RANDOM PEOPLE~!
“Hey, buddy, what’s you name?”
“I just kicked STAN!”
Jeff Hardy Vs Carlito – WWE Intercontinental Championship Match
After watching both men be utter shite in their matches at Unforgiven, I have no desire to sit through this. Oh, other options were Shelton and Nitro.
CAL SCALE – -1
Shawn Michaels & Triple H Vs Randy Orton & Edge – Special Guest Referee: Eric Bischoff
DX Vs Rated RKO. Options were for either Bischoff, Vince McMahon or THE COACH to be the guest referee. Everyone picked Bischoff because there were heavy rumours of a DX Vs NWO match in the future .
Shawn exposes Edge’s arse, while Randy stands on the apron with a look of “what have I got myself into tagging with this ejit?” on this face .
According to Lawler, the fans have made some well well decisions tonight. Nope, no type there. Well well decisions.
Pretty dull and uninspiring first half of this match. DX shine period, then suddenly Rated RKO are in control and HHH has a shitty FIP segment. Hot tag to Shawn that eventually leads to him taking a turn at being FIP and this is where shit picks up because HBK is actually a good FIP.
Fuck me Bischoff must be the slowest counting referee in the world. And not in the heel way where he counts slow for DX… every count is unbelievably SLOW .
Unfortunately HBK being a good FIP doesn’t help much when Orton and Edge are boring as fuck on offence.
SPEAR TO BISCHOFF~!
SPEAR AND RKO TO HHH~!
Another referee comes in and… HHH kicks out . He took a Spear then an RKO and still kicked out .
SUPERKICK TO ORTON~! I could watch Orton get superkicks in the face all day.
BISCHOFF PULLS OUT THE OTHER REFEREE TO BREAK UP THE COUNT~!
CHAIR TO HBK~!
CHAIR TO HHH~!
RKO ON THE CHAIR~!
And Rated RKO get the win.
Well this was fucking DULL until the last few minutes when they go into the finishing stretch. But that alone doesn’t help it because the finishing stretch was built to with boring, dull shitty crap.
CAL SCALE – 0
Lita Vs Mickie James – WWE Women’s Championship Diva Lumberjacks Match
So this is the final of a tournament, since Trish retired with the belt after winning it from Lita at Unforgiven.
Choices were Lumberjack, Submission and No DQ. DQ missed out with about 5%. Bah. Shouldn’t this be a Lumberjill match anyway?
Any excuse to have all the divas surrounding the ring lol. I swear I could only name half of them .
“There’s no such thing as a sure thing, unless it’s name is Lita” .
It’s slow, it’s sloppy, but I can’t take my eyes off it .
Lita wins. Yey .
Shame the match was awful .
CAL SCALE – 0
OH NOES THE SPIRIT SQUAD ARE BREAKING APART! WON’T SOMEBODY STOP THE MADNESS?!?!
The Spirit Squad Vs Ric Flair & Roddy Piper – World Tag Team Championship Match
It’s Flair and Piper. But it’s Flair and Piper in 06. Well, Piper in 06. Flair is still awesome in any decade tbh. But their opponents are male cheerleaders. But this is Piper’s first and only tag title win in WWE, and if I’m not mistaken only his second title in the company ever too (first was IC in 92). And Piper unfortunately got diagnosed with Cancer and had to drop the belt too (thankfully he kicked it’s arse).
Ah screw it, it’s fucking FLAIR AND PIPER. I’m gonna endure .
The other options for Flair’s partner, Slaughter and Dusty, come out to ringside anyway to even the odds. Only 4 legends at ringside, but most of them count as 2 people .
Sad to see the state of Piper at this time tbh . I wanna make a joke about how fat he looks but I don’t know if that was anything to do with his cancer or not, and well, Cancer is a sensitive subject for me and I don’t like making jokes about it regardless.
Kenny has a sleeper on Piper, who stars moving Kenny’s legs and walking him over to Flair to try and make a tag . He may be old, he may be a little out of shape, but he can still be awesome .
JR bringing up Flair and Piper’s history from Mid-Atlantic .
SUPER MEGA HIGH TOP ROPE LEG DROP BY KENNY TO BREAK IT UP~! Pretty impressive leg drop tbh.
FIGURE FOUR AGAIN~! Piper stops Kenny from breaking it up, and FLAIR AND PIPER WIN THE WORLD TAG TITLES!!!
Well, if I skipped this I wouldn’t have been missing much at all, but oh well .
CAL SCALE – 0
Booker T trying to convince Cena to help him tonight since Show turned him down. Cena wants Booker to whore out Sharmell for the night in order to help him. THE FACE OF THE WWE, FOLKS!!! BOOKER T AGREES . Cena claims he was joking. Yeah, ok. I BELIEVE YOU .
John Cena Vs The Big Show Vs Booker T – World Heavyweight Championship Match
CHAMPION OF CHAMPIONS MATCH~! The fans got to decide which title is on the line. They went with Booker T because I guess they hoped someone would win it from him because fuck me Booker T was awful. Oh, sorry, KING Booker. When he was twice as annoying as usual…
Ha, there is some music in the video package that totally reminds me of Halo. Then it switches up to the shitty PPV theme . Now I wanna play Halo again. The first, of course.
BOOKER AND CENA ARE NOT DAWGS~! JR is awesome.
Cena decks Booker, and Booker fucks off to the floor leaving Show to maul Cena. Good strategy for Booker, and great for fans as it cuts down on Booker action .
Dammit, Booker is back in the match . Axe Kick’s Big Show while he’s leaning on the ropes. Guess that was pretty cool. Yey Big Show is killing Booker . Crazy to think that at this time, the ECW CHAMPION was the best major champion in the company. Benoit is the current US champ so I didn’t want to say Show is the best champ overall .
at clearly being able to see Big Show preparing himself to get knocked over the ropes by Cena and Booker.
Big Show’s beard appears to be sweating. Oh no, it’s just him drooling as usual. WHY DOES BIG SHOW DROOL SO MUCH?!?!
BOOKEND~! CENA KICKS OUT~!
Oh my god there is still 15 minutes of the show left? So at least 10 minutes of match probably? I wanna cry.
Big Show took a bump on the steel steps and was knocked out for like 5 whole minutes . Leaving us with Booker Vs Cena.
Then finally Show returns to the match and it picks up again. Basically: Big Show = fun. Booker & Cena = SOMEONE SHOOT ME.
*sigh* Show gets a steel chair kicked in his face and he seems to be out of the match again.
F-U TO SHARMELL. WHO DIDN’T GET INVOLVED IN THIS MATCH ONCE. THE FACE OF THE WWE, FOLKS! What a guy.
Kevin Federline gets involved . Remember his feud with Cena?
WHC TO THE FACE OF CENA~! BOOKER T WINS~!
This. Was. Awful. Big Show was the ONLY good thing in the match and unfortunately he got knocked out of it twice.
CAL SCALE – 0
Overall CAL SCALE – 1.5