SCRAMBLE MATCHES!!! I really liked the concept back in the day, so I’m hoping I still do on a re-watch all these years later .
Matt Hardy Vs The Miz Vs Chavo Guerrero Jr Vs Mark Henry Vs Finlay – ECW Championship Scramble Match
5 guys in the match, 2 start off, every 5 minutes someone else enters. 20 minute time limit. Kinda like capture the flag in that whoever has the “ECW title” at the end is the winner and champion. None of the wins here count as title wins unless someone new ends up with the belt at the end. Understand? Good .
HENRY is the champion, and luckily for him he isn’t one of the 2 men starting off the match… but unlucky for me cos I wanna see Henry murder people for 20 minutes . Instead we’re stuck with the Jiz. Matt Hardy too though .
These two go back and forth, and meh, Jiz just doesn’t make me interested in anything that’s happening. He hits his finisher, and Hardy rolls to the floor and Jiz just screams “noooooo” like a baby.
Oh god Chabo is out next. He shows up, hits a Frog Splash on Hardy and is the “current champion” . Remember when they did this type of match for the Hardcore championship, and every reign ACTUALLY COUNTED?
SIDE EFFECT~! HARDY PINS CHABO~! HE’S THE CURRENT CHAMPION SORT OF KIND OF NOT REALLY BUT COULD BE IF HE DOESN’T GET PINNED ANY TIME SOON. DOES HE HAVE TO BE PINNED? I DON’T THINK HE DOES, RIGHT? RIGHT.
Fuck yes, FINALLY. Henry is coming to fuck shit up . Everyone in the ring decides to stick together to take out Henry. Because if they don’t, he’ll KILL EM.
Lol, Henry KILLS EM anyway .
Before HALL OF PAIN Henry, there was ECW HENRY. And it was just as fucking awesome. WORLD’S STRONGEST SLAM TO CHABO~! HENRY “REGAINS” HIS TITLE FOR THE TIME BEING!!!
Ahhh, is there any sweeter sound in the world than Chabo screaming in pain while Henry has him in a bear hug?
FINLAY . FINLAY AND HENRY BEATING THE SHIT OUT OF EACH OTHER .
HENRY CHASING A MIDGET . Second only to Undertaker’s dealings with Hornsoggle .
FINLAY PINS HARDY TO BECOME THE “CURRENT” CHAMPION!!! 3 and a half minutes left!!!
HARDY PINS JIZ~!
3 minutes left, and HENRY is back into the match looking to take his championship back! Boy, I would not want to be one of the other guys in the match!!!
The last minute and a half really does live up to the SCRAMBLE name as everyone is moving around hitting finishers and breaking up pins as they all desperately try to either win the belt or retain it .
The time runs out and MATT HARDY wins the ECW Championship!!!
Well, I’m a little disappointed in this tbh. I remember liking it a lot more, but the match was kinda dull before Henry and Finlay showed up. That’s what happens when you have JIZ AND CHABO in the match longer than talented wrestlers . But once Finlay and Henry showed up, it got FUN AS FUCK.
CAL SCALE – 2
Cryme Tyme Vs Cody Rhodes & Ted DiBiase – World Tag Team Championship Match
CAL SCALE – -1
Shawn Michaels Vs Chris Jericho – Non Sanctioned Match
Jericho socked Shawn’s wife RIGHT IN THE KISSER. So this match is happening. But not really because it ISN’T SANCTIONED.
Oh boy. I don’t think I’m ready for this. Their entire 08 series tends to get a LOT of love, but I’ve never liked the majority of it. This match included.
Well this starts off fun, so that’s good at least . Shawn is full of HATE~! and beats the shit out of Jericho with his boot and while on the outside at one point, absolutely DECKS Jericho in the face in what is probably the single greatest punch HBK has ever thrown.
Oh boy, it’s already started to go downhill . Right, so these two men HATE each other. I like HBK using his boot as a weapon. HBK going for a chair is good too. But really, if you are out to murder someone, WHY WOULD YOU GO UNDER THE RING, GET A TABLE AND SET IT UP? That was Jericho that did that btw, not HBK. HBK hasn’t gone retarded in this match… yet. There is still time .
Aaaaand the table doesn’t even get used. So it’s just sat there, waiting for later no doubt.
Urgh, they already did a TEASE GOING THROUGH THE TABLE spot. JUST PUNCH EACH OTHER IN THE FACE YOU FUCKS.
Wait, nevermind. HBK sucks at punching people in the face…
HBK choking the life out of Jericho… just to put him down for an elbow drop. FFS.
Then he goes for Sweet Chin Music and… decides not to connect. WHY? The commentators say it’s because it’s not “good enough” to end this thing and that Shawn isn’t done. HE DIDN’T HAVE TO FUCKING PIN HIM AFTERWARDS. Fuck me, what a god damn moron. SEE, I KNEW HBK WOULD GO ALL RETARDED.
HBK just went eye fist into the steel chair. REMEMBER THE EYE, KING! Fairly certain Lawler is familiar with injured eyes .
Non sanctioned match and Jericho is letting the referee stop him from ripping out Shawn’s eye. The referee should literally be there to ring the bell and nothing more.
Oh, NOW Jericho decides to tell the referee to fuck off… not when he’s ripping Shawn’s eye out, but when he’s using the Walls of Jericho.
Lance Cade shows up. Why on earth didn’t he show up at the START of the match? IT’S NON FUCKING SANCTIONED YOU TITS.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING THAT FOR?!?! come on ref, isn’t it obvious?
Well, the table finally gets used. Yawn. Cade takes on hell of a shot to the head with Sweet Chin Music though. Looked like it might have actually connected.
Finally some more HATE~! with HBK repeatedly smashing the chair down on Jericho. Aaaaand then he decides to do another table spot. GOD. DAMN. IT.
Oh fuck me it gets even more stupid. Shawn sets up LANCE on the table instead of Jericho. Until he sees Jericho moving around and remembers that he hates JERICHO and not so much Cade.
Elbow through the table and… HBK starts crying? Ok…
BELT WHIPPING~! That might have been nice nearer the beginning of the match… but when a few minutes earlier he was essentially whipping Jericho with a STEEL CHAIR… it just doesn’t have the same kind of impact tbh. This match is arse backwards.
The referee rings the bell because… Shawn is punching Jericho in the head too much. HBK wins. Ummm… what?
This match had potential. Really, it did. They DID do some good shit. But they nulified EVERYTHING good by doing double the amount of stupid shit. Seriously, how hard is it to have a HATE~! filled brawl?
CAL SCALE – 0
Jeff Hardy Vs Shelton Benjamin Vs The Brian Kendrick Vs MVP Vs Triple H – WWE Championship Scramble Match
Yey another scramble!!!
at the deafening silence for Shelton’s entrance .
CORNER POWERBOMB . Love that move. Glad Rollins uses it these days cos it wasn’t getting done like… at all for a while.
a double clothesline, but Hardy seems to ignore the fact he got hit too .
Woo, things about to pick up because THE Brian Kendrick is in da house!!!
Kendrick got SWAG. Wish him and Big Zeke were together for longer and did more. Was like a mini version of HBK & Diesel lol.
Twist of Fate and Hardy is the “current” champion. Booooo.
Kendrick lays around in the floor for a while and lets Shelton and Hardy go at it, and they do some fun stuff, especially the HUGE Pay Dirt from Shelton.
OMG KENDRICK IS BACK. SLICED BREAD #2. BRIAN KENDRICK IS THE CURRENT WWE CHAMPION!!! THE BRIAN KENDRICK!!! YES! YES! YES! YES!
MVP is next out and urgh. Just urgh. Fuck off MVP.
THE Brian Kendrick makes me love him even more when he blindsides MVP with a leg lariat to the fucking FACE while MVP is running for a Drive By kick .
Kendrick is on FIRE here, and the fans are really behind him at times too. He’s the champ atm and he’s doing everything in his power to make sure nobody else sneaks in a pin .
HHH is out last, and he has 5 minutes to win back his title from THE Brian Kendrick .
*sigh* in less than a minute, HHH takes everyone out and pins Kendrick. Way to go, Hunter…
TWIST OF FATE TO MVP~! And Hardy is once again the current champ. Booooo.
at the botched counter to Sliced Bread #2. Well done guys.
Oh ffs. HHH pins Kendrick AGAIN.
Then Hardy pins Kendrick while HHH is resting in the corner thinking he’s got this won . Not so much “Booooo” for that because it was hilarious.
15 second left… and HHH pins MVP. Hardy was inches away from HHH. Why didn’t he break it up? BECAUSE HE WAS TRYING TO PIN BENJAMIN. EVEN THOUGH HE WAS THE CHAMPION ALREADY. Fucking moron.
Well, this was better than I remembered it. More fun stuff from a SCRAMBLE match. No classics from the stipulation, but certainly fun!
CAL SCALE – 2
Hey look, its CM Punk!!! He’s the WHC. Got a scramble match later in the night. Or not. He gets mauled by Legacy and his title is forfeited for no reason and he waits like 5 years to get revenge…
Maryse Vs Michelle McCool – WWE Divas Championship Match
CAL SCALE – -1
MIKE ADAMLE~! Announces that Punk likely won’t be in the main event tonight, but the match is still gonna happen even without him!
THE BIG SHOW~! He’s pissed at Vickie. THE UNDERTAKER . He’s pissed at Vickie too. BIG SHOW TURNS ON THE UNDERTAKER OMG I TOTALLY NEVER SAW THAT COMING WHATSOEVER THIS IS SO SHOCKING. Yeah, predictable, but an awesome segment and gave us one hell of a feud between the two .
Batista Vs JBL Vs Kane Vs Rey Mysterio Vs Chris Jericho – World Heavyweight Championship Scramble Match
JBL and Batista just beat the shit out of each other for 5 minutes . Then KANE shows up to join them!!!
Nothing fancy here, but it’s a ton of fun as 3 large men try to destroy each other. If you’re into that sort of thing then you’ll love this!
KANE IS THE CURRENT WHC!!!
He runs into the ring with some stupid Mohawk mask and Kane immediately punches him in the face. STOP LOOKING STUPID.
so fun to watch Mysterio run around and doing flips, only to run into Kane and get knocked the fuck down .
Batista and Rey work together a little until Rey tries to sneak a pin on him. YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE MY FRIEND!!! Oh wait… that isn’t for another year… nevermind.
Down to the final 5 minutes, and is CM Punk gonna show up? Nope. He’s dead or something. Instead we get… Jericho?
He can barely walk after his “match”, and he LOST it too. So why the FUCK is HE the replacement?
Wow, just realised that KANE is not only still the champion, but he’s the only guy with a pin so far!
FUCK ME. Batista killed Rey. KILLED HIM DEAD.
Why is KANE going for a pin? Why is the referee counting? Why is Bastista wasting energy kicking out? KANE IS ALREADY THE CHAMP.
SPINEBUSTER~! Batista is the current WHC with 30 seconds left!!!
Batista Bomb to Rey… and while he’s doing that, Jericho pins Kane and the clock is at 0! Jericho is the WHC .
Well this was better than I was expecting . ECW match is probably the best scramble of the night, but all 3 are super fun and the same rating too!
CAL SCALE – 2
Overall CAL SCALE – 4